There comes a time on every trip when you know it’s time to pull up stakes and head home. For this vacation, that point came when I had to wrestle the rhinestone-studded tweezers from Louises’ hands when I feared she was going to stab a stranger who tried to mansplain to us how to back […]
Tag: Road Trip!
4 Corners
Today, we visited 4 Corners National Monument, and while I feel like we should talk about 4 Corners I don’t think 4 Corners is comfortable with us talking about it. To refresh your elementary school history, Four Corners National Monument is located where the only place in the country that four states touch each other, […]
Day 8–Cooperstown
You know how when you lose the tie to your hoodie in the washing machine and you spend the next few years of your life attempting to thread the end of the oversized cord through a too-small opening and then push that string through a cotton tunnel a millimeter at a time, losing ground faster […]
A Wet Day 4
When we look back on the days of this vacation, there will no doubt be some highlights as well as some lowlights. Day four was quite a mixed bag. Highlight: The Pro Football Hall of Fame! As promised by our sweet hashtag, The first Hall of Fame was enjoyed (briefly) by all! Lowlight: Rain. Of […]
Day Three
We continued our own group heatwave with a trip to the ballpark on Day 3. Translate that to mean we certainly make a splash wherever we go and most of the time we’re a hot mess. But the unsuspecting folks with the Cincinnati Reds were amazing hosts, treating us to a ridiculous experience of delicious […]
Hot up in herre
If you’re reading this, that means I wrote it, and my fingers didn’t melt into the keyboard as I feared mere hours ago when we began our first full day at our campsite on the surface of the sun. It’s hot here in Ohio. In a metal can with wheels. With an A/C unit capable […]
Not the best travel guide in the world, but it’ll do
Alright, enough messing around. We really have to get semi-serious for 6 minutes to pull this off. It’s logistics day, and I’ll take just a minute to provide some real details on the trip planning before we get back to our regularly scheduled nonsense just in case anyone was looking for some real travel advice […]
The Packing List
1. Clothes and stuff Me: Even if we do laundry twice during the trip, that makes about 90 T-shirts and 180 socks just for reference. Butch: Over/under that we return with 11 of the original sock total? Me: Under is how that works. 2. Outdoor Movie System with 70′ Screen and Projector Sundance: Um, do […]
Postscript and legal notes
Now that we’ve been back a few days and Louise’s legal team has had a chance to review the material, (she’s so high maintenance) I thought I’d offer a couple of clarifications from our recent trip. ~All of the mystery rashes and various infections have been cleared up. The only conditions remaining uncured are severe […]
By the Numbers
States visited–14 Miles traveled–4,285 Days on the road–20 Lost/Damaged Shoes–4 Cans of bear mace used–0 Diapers–78 Bags of ice–68 Collective hours of quality sleep–4.5 Car rentals–5 Number of times I called Louise by her real name–0 Quarters used for arcade and laundry–811 Campgrounds–7 Hotels–7 Cell phone data overages–36 GB Times the door flew open while […]