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Suburban Diva ®

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 New Friends
 

When your child makes a new friend, a new relationship is forged between the parents as well. And first impressions can help--or hinder--that budding friendship.

Take last weekend for instance, when my son invited some new friends over to play some football. It was also the day my husband decided to take up the old carpet and hardwood floors in the living room. You would think those wouldn't be two mutually-exclusive events, but then you've never experienced my husband's particular brand of home improvement.

One mother dropped off her son at the height of the chaos. I attempted to explain that the piles of china, ski boots and every telephone book we've received since 1994 were simply the messy remnants after emptying and cleaning out the front coat closet and not from any latent OCD hoarding issues. But I don't know if she heard me over the din of the smoke alarm blaring for the second time that morning.

I signed to my husband: "Please take out the batteries for a minute so I can talk to this woman like a responsible adult."

"What?" He shrugged, as if he's Bob freaking Villa in flip flops. Instead of ripping the thing out of the wall to quiet the incessant beeping, he added more discarded material to the bonfire in the fireplace. I hoped this child didn't have any allergies to toxic carcinogens.

I let out a nervous laugh. "I'm sure glad Johnny could come over today."

My husband called over from fire pit. "Me too. We could use an extra hand stripping that old epoxy!" He joked. I think. I hope.

"Ignore him--he's a kidder. We were just about to start a prayer service and a math lesson."

"Yeah, praying that we don't lose any fingers with this power sander!"

I wonder what about a tool belt and some power tools evokes his inner Randy Quaid.

Mortified, I turn back to this poor woman who, to her credit, is still standing in the crazy house and has not bolted in fear or called the proper authorities.

She pat my hand reassuringly. "That's okay, my husband is changing the oil in the car today. Not even Brian Boitano could skate upright in our driveway slick."

I guess some things about kids (and husbands) are universal.

Along with my son, it looks like I made a new friend, too.

©2009 Tracey Henry

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