Ah, Labor Day…that last hurrah of summer when we're supposed to grill some meat, build a birdhouse and buy a mattress.

Since we have just returned from that 3000 mile road trip recently, we are not very anxious to go anywhere far for the long weekend. Instead, we have decided on the new "Staycation" option that all of the parenting magazines and local hotels are talking about. That ameliorative new term to describe staying at home instead of going somewhere really fun to make us feel better over skyrocketing gas and travel prices.

As much as a staycation appeals to me right now, I'd much rather do a laycation. Three days of never getting out of bed except to move to the couch and check for bed sores. But I don't think the kids will go for that as they would prefer a playcation where we surround ourselves with toys and play for 36 hours straight. However, as no weekend in our house would be complete without a trip to the ER, this might just lead to a breakation.

My husband would probably appreciate this idea of staying put since he wants to avoid a paycation. My idea of a good time is a luxury resort somewhere. This is pricey, because such a getaway is the ultimate traycation where every meal is ordered from room service.

Once, we tried a camping daycation. We set up a tent for a night at a state park and got eaten by mosquitoes pterodactyls while sweating under an arctic level sleeping bag. Actually, that might have been more of a greycation since that was the color of my hair after watching a toddler around a campfire and 10 citronella candles.

A praycation occurs at the beach. You pray it's not crowded, not too hot and that it doesn't rain. When all of these things happen simultaneously and you end up staying for a whole 6 minutes, it ends up being a naycation.

And let us not forget the Oy Veycation to an amusement park. The lines are so freaking long on Labor Day weekend that you can only go on one ride every 12 hours and all of the food stands are either sold out of hot dogs or adequate seating so you end up eating a package of ketchup for dinner standing in line for Space Mountain.

So I suppose staying home this long weekend relaxing is an Okaytion.

At least that's what I'll tell the kids since I'll be fakationing with thoughts of that unlimited room service at a luxury resort.

©2008 Tracey Henry

Divamail me since I'll be home to read it. Divamail@Suburbandiva.com.